Shout Outs to people, LOST and Shout Outs to LOST -

OK, this is going to be combo post dedicated to both LOST and to an official new Brain Litter policy where I’m going to give shout outs to anyone that gives me a compliment about my blog, because I have a big ego and it makes me feel damn good when someone says they enjoy my writing and I want to encourage that kind of behavior when I’m out and about.

For instance, I was talking to MICHELLE STEFENS the other night and she gave me a real nice compliment about how she once printed off a post to show a co-worker my ideas for Facebook relationship updates. I told her I would express my gratitude by having her Brain Littered with capital letters and a bold font.

Again, I was talking to VANG the other week at Cropseys and he too told me that he really likes my blog, especially the high school reminiscing I get into sometimes. So, to return the favor, I want to post this sexy picture of him from this one time we went up north.


The caption for this photo is “Sexy Vang SMOLDERS after presumably, a long, passionate night of love making. Sorry ladies, this side of beef is no longer on the market”.

See how this works?

ERIC KIVI gets one, too, he’s a long time reader, long time complimentor. Unfortunately, I do not have sexy photos of him I can post from high school. At least I did not put him at the nerd table on my middle school map of the lunchroom so I guess that is something to be happy about.

I wish Vanlieshout would compliment me more because I have LOT’s of good photos of him. Like this one.



Being roommates freshmen year does have its advantages, I must say. This picture must have been very important because this was taken before the digital camera heyday where you actually had to spend money to have something like this developed and then scanned onto a computer.

Okay, on to LOST.

I’m starting to like the finale a lot more now that I think about. I wish the show had a more ambiguous ending so it could be interpreted in different ways, but the ending was pretty cut and dry. Everyone lived happily ever after, and I guess I’m okay with that. I liked all the characters on the show and I like that they all got a shot at redemption so they could rest peacefully in the afterlife. We should all be so lucky. It would also be nice to have a cute yellow lab at my side when I realize the final truth. That’s the way to go.

I found myself spending a lot of time reading other people’s reviews and observations these past few weeks. I have devoted a lot of time and thought to LOST and I don’t want to say goodbye to it just yet. Between The Wire and LOST, these were easily the best two dramas of the last decade.

But I’m sure I will find something else to occupy my time. That Pawn Stars is pretty good. It will do for now.

I Don't Understand Porn for Women

So I recently read this article on MSN that said that pornography use among women has spiked in recent years and that support groups are forming all over the country to help women deal with porn addiction.

This made me really curious. What constitutes porn for women? It can’t be the same stuff guys like because the stuff guys like is misogynistic, devoid of emotion, and completely out of touch with reality. So I did some homework, adjusted my Netflix queue, and finally viewed some hardcore XXX women’s pornography last night.

I didn’t care for it. New Moon was rife with terrible acting, even more terrible special FX, it was super boring, it didn’t even make sense, and there wasn’t nearly enough sequences of vampires playing baseball. All and all, I give it six thumbs down.

Maybe I have to give the benefit of the doubt that the Twilight books are vastly superior to the films because it’s pretty much impossible to mess up the source material. Who doesn’t love vampires? They are attractive, possess superhuman abilities, they party all night, and they live forever. I get it. That’s cool.

I just can’t understand the appeal these particular movies have on teenage girls, their moms, and not teenage girls. Approximately 50% of the running time was devoted to people soulfully staring into each other’s eyes, another 40% was devoted to dudes not wearing shirts, and the rest was tensionless scenes of CGI cartoons fighting each other.

And why does everyone like Bella so much!? Sure, I wouldn’t kick Kristen Stewart out of bed, but it’s perplexing why everyone fusses about her so much. Her character’s total lack of charm and charisma is like a black hole in the center of the screen, she just sucks the fun right out of the room.

To me, all this sounds like a recipe for disaster but the numbers at the box office prove otherwise. I guess women’s porn is here to stay. When I complete my script for Jumping the Shark, I will be sure to incorporate a scene where a character stares out the window and emotes for ten minutes, in order to appeal to the ladies.

Oh snap, I just had a better idea. I’ll cast that tool Justin Bieber as a shirtless, singing vampire, and have him in there for some reason for ten minutes. Damn I should have been a producer! That, my friends, is what you call box office gold.



"Hey, want to go tanning?" Nope. "Want to smile at any point during this movie" Nope. "Want to keep staring at each other" Yep.

Conservative Talk AM Radio Versus Fingernails On A Chalkboard?

Do you ever get that feeling of dread right before going on a car trip with your dad because you know you’re about to get your ears blasted by full volume conservative talk AM radio when he starts the car?

I do. Like touching a doorknob on a dry winter day, you’re going to get jolted and there’s nothing you can do about it.

And I’m conservative too which is the weird thing. I can’t tell if its that low quality, tinny sound with the random pops and zaps that drives me nuts or just the fact that all conservative talk show hosts are obnoxious and rarely offer any real solutions and they are an embarrassment to rational conservatives everywhere.

Take for instance, that clown Michael Savage. My Dad and I drove up to Lakewood this last weekend and for a good hour, he rambled off crazy left-wing conspiracies off the internet on the cause of the current oil rig disaster off the gulf coast. First it was the environmentalists that sabotaged the rig. Then it was a North Korean mini-sub. Then it was Chinese ninjas or some shit.

And ALL of them were related to Barrack Obama somehow. Obama could cut taxes to zero % and declare a national holiday “Everyone Gets A Gun – You’re Welcome America Day” and those AM hypocrites would still find a reason to complain about him.

Sure, I’m up for a frank and honest discussion if Obama is leveraging our country to the hilt or severely screwing up our healthcare system but I don’t want to hear childish name calling and mindless rhetoric. I would even consider joining one of those Tea Party events if I wasn’t so afraid a Klan rally would break out immediately afterwards. But AM conservative talk radio is pollution and I can’t stand it.

The realization of my hatred for loud conservative AM talk radio made me happy because I realized that I am not as old as I thought. I know MTV doesn’t want me anymore but at least Rush Limbaugh doesn’t want me either.

That was the best age-related revelation I’ve had since I realized my own mortality back in the summer of 2007 when I saw the movie Sunshine in theaters. Man, you should of my heard my inner monologue during that particular screening, whew! Maybe for another post.

In the meantime, I’m going to keep on be-bopping away to pop music when I ride to work in the morning and continue my search to find ever elusive ways to insert monetary symbols into my name like Ke$ha.