Sunday, September 12, 2010

Kevin Kolb. Does anyone know how to pronounce this guy's last name?

I’ve never been more excited for a football season since forever. I can’t explain it. I don’t whether it’s because of the hype surrounding the Packers Super Bowl prospects or because of my sweet fantasy football drafts, or because I love gambling on football but one thing is for certain, I am pacing around the house as we speak waiting for the Packers to trounce the Eagles and I’m loving every minute of it.

I know I sound like a broken record but fantasy football seriously changed my life. Conversations with me about football before Fantasy Football primarily consisted of me debating if Favre played a great game or merely a very good one. I could care less about any other game going on in the league.

But since I started playing fantasy football about four years ago, I’ve got a ravenous appetite for insider knowledge to give me a leg up on my ff playing brethren. Now you’re more likely to debate the pronunciation of Philly QB Kevin Kolb’s last name and whether he merits to start in a ff fantasy football line up with me rather than your typical Packer banter.

Is it pronounced like Cob or like rhymes with Bulb? No one knows. It’s a big secret apparently. Either way, it was a heavily debated topic the other night at Anduzzi’s which soon delved into whether or not Kevin Kolb looks like me from a side angle.

Which he does FYI.

Another thing that boosted my love of football is buying numbers at Cropsey’s. Numbers are the best form of gambling ever. Any game with numbers involved is no different that sitting at a slot machine. Your numbers are up, you experience a high, someone misses a field goal or something, your numbers are off and you experience the low. Ups and downs, wins and losses, the same brain chemicals are at work, the only difference is you can watch an exciting football at the same time and you don’t have to sit next to some hacking, chain smoking grandma for three hours. Bonus.

You also have some form of control with numbers. I can count numerous instances where I’ve mentally channeled Aaron Rodgers and willed the offense to get a quick score in before half time in order to win some bucks. I did that like three times last season alone. Trying doing that with a slot machine. It doesn’t work.

Lastly, the Packers are a hot Super Bowl pick and Brett Favre is still playing, all perfect recipes for an exciting NFL season. But if I can make a suggestion, I think we should all collectively not mention the Packers and the Super Bowl any more until we actually get there. It seems like every hyped team in the NFL preseason has never actually made it to the Super Bowl, it’s usually always a sleeper and the stupid Colts so let’s just all calm down a little bit and enjoy the season and not jinx our awesome team this year.



We all agreed last Friday that Kevin Kolb is like a younger, older looking version of me with similar shitty facial hair growing abilities and inferior quarterbacking skills.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you look more like Mike Vick.

Anonymous said...

I think the "l" is silent.

JD said...

Yes, he is handsome - in an ugly sort of way.

Ykolb said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ykolb said...

He says it as if kalb, I grew up with this last name as well an we pronounced it as coleb. This name was rarely pronounced correctly and it drove me crazy kolb kalb Cobb aaaarrrrrggggg!