Blog Me? Blog You!

Alright Internet, I don’t like you and you don’t like me.

Well that’s not necessarily true…I do kind of like you, Internet. You’ve given me free music and movies, up-to-date news and weather reports to distract me at work, and fantasy football. I won’t even mention that you’ve essentially taught me the birds and bees through your infinite stash of pornographic materials.

I guess I owe you a quite a bit.

Which is why I have decided to bring Brain Litter out of retirement: To feed you a couple extra kilobytes of binary code to help alleviate your insatiable appetite for raw pointless data. I realize my content is far from a hearty meal, but at least it will tide you over until those assholes at Facebook get their shit together.

For those of you who don’t know what I’m talking about, I’m referring to the falling out at Facebook HQ over that new FEED feature that updates you on random wall posts and comments from other users. Talk about a horrible idea going more horribly awry.

I bet you were puking your guts out when that feature was released, huh, Internet? What’s that, you say? Just the dry heaves? Yeah, that happens to me too when I drink too much cheap tequila.

I really don’t know why I stopped writing in the first place. It’s one of the few things I really enjoy doing besides going out with my friends and dominating 5-star sudoku puzzles. There have been so many times over the past few months when I’d be out and I’d witness something cool or be part of some weird event and in the back of my head, I’d be thinking, oh man, I can’t wait to get home and blog the shit out of this interaction, but alas! I can not, for I have forsaken my creativity to be some cog in a wheel.

Cog no more, I’ve got some big ideas (blog and non-blog) that I’d like to make happen between now and next spring. Ideas so big that it necessitated the purchase of a giant 40 dollar dry erase board, because big ideas need a big medium to be written down on. Yeah, I’m THAT guy now; guy that paces around a room, stroking my chin and pondering at a big dry erase board, while drinking a Cabernet and listening to Beethoven’s 5th Symphony in the background. I know, what a douche bag I have become.

At least I don’t have a clipboard, though. I’ve got a long way to go before I become Clipboard Guy.

Stay tuned, ladies and gents, me and Internet have some interesting things lined up for yuhs.



A lot has happened since my last post. For instance, Joe got pubes now.