But it doesn’t have to be so difficult. This year, consider the idea of getting someone a Not Gift. For example, one of the best Christmas presents I ever gave my parents was when I grew my hair out for a year in 2003 and then got a hair cut for them for Christmas. I gave them the Not Gift of not having a son that looked like a hippie.
Now I realize it’s too late to grow your hair out but maybe consider growing a shitty beard for the holidays and then having it shaved Christmas morning for your loved ones. Unless of course, you grow an awesome beard which is a gift to the entire world. I can only grow patchy Amish neck beards, so my Not Gift could potentially have a lot of clout.
I’d like to take moment here to declare a Not Gift for Jess. We are celebrating our one year anniversary this Saturday and I want to commemorate the occasion by retiring my brown leather jacket from my wardrobe. Apparently Jess never watched Charles In Charge growing up because she doesn’t seem to realize that brown leather jackets are cool. Nobody’s perfect. At any rate, I know she will appreciate the Not Gift of not being seen around town with a brown leather jacket wearing boyfriend.
But before I do [Tear] I’d like to say one last goodbye to my old friend before decommissioning this well-traveled, well loved article of clothing.
Here is a great picture of my college buddy, Pete, having a grand old time with the brown leather jacket. Look how proud he is to be seen with me! I think this was in 2004.
Me and the BLJ on Full House Mountain in San Francisco back in 2007.
Me and BLJ have spanned continents together. Here I am bringing my coolness to Australia, hanging out with the armor of Ned Kelly in 2009. Notice his armor on the left is leather clad and almost the same color as mine. He was ahead of his time.
Ahhhhhhh good times. You will be missed BLJ, you will be missed.
Jess, I know you are reading this so now I am going to make it official: I will never wear my brown leather jacket again. Period.*
*Except for my birthday, whenever you are out of town, and weekends. Love ya, babes!
8 comments:
I am so happy for everyone that won't have too look at that old bomber jacket of yours! I'm with you on this one Jess!!
I have character, dammit! Character!
Weekends??? That is exactly when the jacket is preferred to NOT be seen!
I'm certainly going to miss BLJ. That jacket was the best thing about Ben.
I'm only kidding, Sweetheart, I think you look sexy in your brown leather jacket and I think you should wear it more often:)
Thanks, Jess, I'm glad you that your name hasn't been tampered with for a fake comment and that you approve!
Seeing as BLJ is full of integrity and character perhaps BLJ would like to give back to the community for the holidays. Such as becoming a tax deductible donation and providing warmth to a young child in 1990.
Jess does not approve of the ugly jacket! Thanks Ben, for creating a fake Jessica MacGregor and posting that comment. I agree that you should donate that thing and help another child blossom into a nerd :)
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